November 13, 2012

Hardcore Gratitude Day 2 - Mistakes I've Made

 
I made the choice with all the wisdom of a 14 year old - I moved in with M. (26, divorced, introduced me to cocaine). I wasn't coerced, I wasn't forced, I was seduced. And, I was ripe for the seduction. I thought I was ready to take on grown up responsibilities. 14 is not an easy age - at school, for mothers and daughters, for making great life choices. I furthered the mistake by stubbornly sticking to my "commitment." When I changed my mind about how I was thinking, leaving was easy.  I am learning to love that young woman who so needed love, affection, and attention. I did get those, the man was not evil, just broken and needy too. Although, had the same happened in my daughter's life, I wouldn't want to be responsible for my retaliatory actions. (There is still some anger there, that's good. The facts have never been in question, I need to accept the feelings too.) My "mistake" informed my life - I really get that we all are doing the very best we can at the time or we would be doing better; even M. Thank you M for teaching me that I was lovable, I did need it. Thank you, me, for growing up and continuing to grow. Thank you God for redeeming all situations.

Magic Black Paperie by Kitty Designs available at Oscraps; Hardcore Gratitude by Traci Reed available at Traci Reed Website;  Fonts: CenturyGothic; Credit Tracker Anna Forrest Designs
Hardcore Gratitude - Traci Reed
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